1. Pace

2. Orientation/focus

3. Setting

4. Time

How fast or slow do you or another speak? Conflicting speeds impede effective communication. Think about your normal pace and how a faster or slower speaker makes you feel. If a conversation is important, adjust your pace to more closely match the other persons’. In a group meeting, rephrase statements at as many different paces as the members require.

Orientation/Focus simply refers to personality; i.e., social/people, facts/data, dominant, etc. Social people start with personal conversation. Fact people start with relevant information. Sales people and accountants or tech people rarely communicate effectively. Their orientations are too different. Consider the other person’s orientation and adopt as much of it as you can.

The specific setting sets its own communication style needs. At lunch or a cocktail party you would not use the same communication style as you would at a business meeting. Crises require a different style than brain storming sessions. Take the setting and contact intent into account whenever possible.

Time factors play a major role in effective communication. Standing meetings imply limited time. Sit down sessions suggest more time. A person who wants to get to the point gets annoyed by someone who won’t. Which are you? Think about the time imperative when adopting a specific style in a given setting.

Effective communicators vary their communication style to suit the circumstances and audience. Use the communication post; learn your style, observe different ones and improve your connections.

1. Adapt themselves to different styles to enhance communication.

2. Recognize which communication style best fits specific circumstance.

3. Avoid judgements about other people’s communication .

‘Adapt or die’ is a bit extreme, but true in many personal interactions. A slow speaker mistrusts a fast talker. A social person gets uncomfortable talking to someone who doesn’t respond in kind. These differences come from personality, environment, position and pressure.

A supervisor under pressure to get a report out can’t take time to listen to the staff person’s weekend adventures. Later, when the report is done, they may take the time to go back and hear all about it. Both parties need to recognize the situation, respect the other person’s needs and accommodate them as appropriate. Supervisor: ‘I’m against a tight deadline. Can you get me this information quickly? Staff person: “Here’s the information you requested. Maybe later we can catch up.”

If the supervisor spent time being annoyed by the staff person’s talk of their weekend, or the staff person got offended that the supervisor wouldn’t listen to them, both would leave the conversation dissatisfied. Their relationship suffers and neither wants a repeat. Taking the time to acknowledge the staff person’s communication style and giving a reason to cut it short, makes it easier for the staff person to accept it as a short term, appropriate to the situation, adjustment.

Know and work with both your style and that of others. It’s a great way to become a truly effective communicator.

1. They connect with the speaker and the message.

2. They adapt their listening style.

3. People appreciate being heard.

Complete listening requires eye contact, focus on the speaker, suspended judgement, clarification to understand and waiting until the speaker is finished before any response. All signals the speaker’s message is important. A justifiable complaint is, ‘no one pays any attention to me or my ideas’. Effective listeners do pay attention and, the speaker feels respected and valued, even if the listener does not agree with them.

Listening and communication style differences create many interpersonal problems. Every person has a specific style. Connect positively: recognize, understand and respectfully adopt the speaker’s style. This may be word speed – rapid delivery versus slow and thoughtful; or orientation – social or factual. A serious listener identifies the speaker’s style and adapts to it.

Let the speaker complete their statement before deciding what they are saying. This is one of the most difficult aspects of effective listening and one of the most crucial. Even if you ‘know’ what they are going to say, you have to hear them out; they may be coming from a new direction and they will never trust you to listen again.

Effective listening has many parts. All are critical to connect and communicate with others. Effective listeners know their own listening/communication style. They recognize different styles, when to use them and want to learn what others try to tell them. They respect people’s right to be different and embrace that in order to make total connections with others.

The most successful people do all they can to learn effective listening skills and use them. It takes time and patience, but the rewards are great.

To unify people’s ears and eyes means
to make people look and listen in concert
so that they do not become confused and disorderly.
- The Art of War by Sun Tzu

Words and their use determine an organization’s attitude. The company’s approach to people and their communication styles, either positive or negative, establishes the norm and the overall environment. A positive outlook encourages cooperation, respect and understanding between people and groups. A negative environment occurs when people’s styles clash and there is conflict between people and departments.

• Picture your last staff meeting. Mentally observe the people sitting around the conference table. How many were concentrating on the speaker? How many were reading their notes? How many were doodling or otherwise thinking about something other than the matter at hand?
• Think about the last time there was an interdepartmental meeting. Was there a spirit of “everyone is in this together” or did signs of territory protection arise?

Consider how individuals in the organization interact. Do they demonstrate an interest in and respect for each other, or do they resist dealing with people who act or speak or act differently than they do?

In short, is your organization at war or peace with itself? If it is at war, why would you want to act as the peace negotiator? Here are some reasons:

1. You complete projects quickly because everyone is working toward a common goal.
2. You and your co-workers achieve a high level of personal satisfaction.
3. Positive achievements build on themselves, negative wins must be constantly defended
   from future attacks so you save time and energy.
4. The workplace is more attractive so there is less stress every time you walk through
   the door.

If your department or organization is at war how do you reach a peace accord? Consider some of the following steps:

1. Observe the group as a whole to determine the source of gossip or rumor
2. Evaluate how negative communication is currently being rewarded
3. Find an area of easy agreement between people or groups
4. Encourage a truce or peace agreement on that subject with that group
5. Reward the positive outcomes of the agreement
6. Eliminate or severely reduce the negative communication reward system
7. After the new behavior is established, find the next area for agreement
8. Repeat steps 4, 5 and 6
9. Continue the process until a totally new behavior pattern is established

Change from war to peace is not easy. It requires a total commitment and willingness to alter behavior patterns at every organizational level. It can be done. The rewards are significant in terms of morale, productivity and personal satisfaction.

Rochelle Devereaux
Busienss Efficacy
PO Box 4081
Salem, OR 97302-1081
www.businessmasters.com
rochelle@businessmasters.com
503 581-4100
503 581-8705 (fax)
800 489-4109 (outside Salem calling area)

Change is Scary

People generally fear change. Suggestions for new approaches to work, or directions for the company, require personal and organizational adjustments. Just because the change advisor knows why things need alteration, others may not. Do you or others around you silently consider alternatives and then, without any warning, ask others to implement them? If so, the most likely result is a vocal NO or quiet resistance. It’s the organizational equivalent of someone popping up and yelling BOO! in a darkened room.

Make Change Comfortable

Do you like to fight? Is resistance a stimulant? No? Then before you threaten people with ideas, make the idea of change easier to take. What’s that? You’ve tried that and it didn’t work? Here are some suggestions that might ease the way.

1. When you think changes are necessary, identify who will be affected by them.
2. Bring those people into the planning process by:
• telling them what you think might be needed
• get their reactions to your ideas
• have them help develop the solution
• let them introduce the ideas to others in their immediate work area
3. Set a timeline for carrying out the changes
• establish incremental steps
• evaluate activities at each stage
• identify what may be interfering with the timelines
4. Create systems that allow people to comment on progress, pro or con

In short, get the appropriate people involved from the very beginning, not at the end. You’ll find they are more likely to accept change when they have some say or see that their resistance is going to negatively affect everyone around them.

This does not mean that everyone will embrace change, or that they won’t be uncomfortable. But, a sudden shift will not shock them.

Communication and Involvement are the Essential

Notice that each part of the process outlined above involves communicating with people. It is not dictating to them. It is getting them involved. Outline your thoughts and let them offer theirs to you. Keep an open mind. Have them do the same. It might take a little longer, but the results are worth the wait.

It’s Your Choice

You’re in charge. You choose how to go on. You set the organization’s tone. If you resist new ideas, after a while you won’t get any. The creative people will look for appreciation for their ideas somewhere else. If your employees resist change, you need to be open to why and prepared to help them overcome those specific objections. If they cannot, you might need to replace them with people who will.

The biggest choice you have to make is: will I or won’t I communicate completely with those people who must carry out any change? Will I be open to new ideas? Can I get others to be open as well?

Assess the way you present change to others. Look at how you respond to suggestions. Be honest and keep an open mind. When change is necessary to your company’s success, these actions can quickly pay dividends.

Rochelle Devereaux
Business Efficacy

If you need help in assessing the change process in your organization, contact Rochelle Devereaux, Business Efficacy, 503/581-4100; e-mailrochelle@businessmasters.com for a free initial consultation.

Successful businesses recognize the importance of fine-tuning and adjustments in all operational areas. What does this entail and how can you start a periodic maintenance program for your firm?

1. Take out your prior year goals list.
2. Bring in everyone who participated in working toward those goals.
3. Assess your performance – how many did you reach, how many are almost there, and, which ones did you not reach.
4. Discuss how and why you did or did not reach goals. Do this positively – not in an atmosphere of blame or shame.
5. Identify new goals for the coming year.
6. Determine who will be responsible for each one and how you can achieve them.
7. Identify resources, both internal and external, you’ll need to accomplish your objectives.
8. Set timelines for evaluations during the year.
9. Get started!

If you don’t have a list from last year, evaluate your accomplishments and challenges from that period. Then, establish a written list for the coming year. Post that list where everyone can see it and update it regularly when a goal is reached.

Periodic business assessments help keep you on track and highlight potential opportunities and challenges.

The better you manage the business and lead others toward a vision of the future, the more likely the business will succeed.

Need help getting a tune-up program started in your firm? Contact Rochelle Devereaux, Business Efficacy, 581-4100.

Did you create one that is achievable and clear?

Businesses exist for a purpose. Do you remember why you formed yours? Or, if you are an employee, do you know your company’s mission? Can you answer that question immediately and clearly? Your company’s success depends on how well you see and follow the plan.

Clearly defined goals (mission statements) help in all areas. They focus your marketing, advertising and sales efforts. They impact the types of employees you hire, even determine if you need to hire anyone at all. They drive the products and quality levels you produce.

Think about the last time you really focused on your company’s goal. Was it recently? Or was it sometime in the past?

If you and everyone else in the organization know what you’re trying to accomplish; if you all head in the same direction; the company is more likely to succeed.

Revisit (or create) your goals. Make sure they are clear. Include measurable activities. Provide benchmarks to evaluate progress. Periodically bring everyone into the process. Keep yourself and your organization in focus.

The Listening Corner… (link not found)

Offering potential solutions to business related listening issues.

Problem:

Our Problem Solving group seems to be led entirely through process by one individual. Others in the group do not actively participate.

Why does the Problem Exist?

People do not participate for a variety of reasons. These could include:

1. they don’t have anything to say;
2. they don’t get rewarded for saying anything;
3. they don’t get an opportunity to say anything;
4. they are uncomfortable in expressing ideas in a group.

Reason #1 is very rare. Most people have something to contribute if they actually belong in the group. So, unless they have no knowledge of the group’s purpose or have no skills that the group needs, they have something to say.

Reason #2 is more common. If people are ignored or feel put-down when they contribute an idea, they probably won’t try again.

Reason #3 is also common. The strongest personalities tend to dominate the group, and, if no one has the skill or the authority to stop them, others won’t get to be heard.

Reason #4 has to do with #2 and #3, as well as personal style. If the individual is shy or soft spoken, it is difficult to speak up in a group.

Solution

This group appears to suffer especially from a failure to get an opportunity to say anything (Reason #3). How to reclaim the group for everyone?

First: The Work Group needs a set of ground rules that specifies that no one person may dominate.

Second: The Work Group needs an agenda. An agenda that incorporates an opportunity for each member to speak. Structuring the meetings to ensure full participation is necessary in this scenario.

Third: The Work Group needs to enforce its ground rules and agenda.

What if you already have those rules and use an agenda, but the dominator still over-rides everyone else?

You have what I call a STAGE HOG; someone who only wants to hear the sound of his/her own voice. Overcoming this problem requires assertiveness and assurance.
1. Set the agenda with specified times for each work group member’s input. Enforce the time limits.

2. When someone else is talking, and this person interrupts, the speaker (or the group leader) must intervene and regain control. This can be accomplished by holding up a hand in a “stop” motion. Remind the interrupter that someone else has the floor. Point out it is someone else’s turn to be heard.

3. If necessary, take the person aside before the meeting and remind them that you have a group effort, and they must listen to the others equally in order to be heard themselves.

This is not an easy situation to overcome. It requires a strong focus on keeping the group viable. It involves making sure every group member knows what they must accomplish. And, it means that everyone has to be given an equal opportunity to express their ideas and be heard by the group.

Rochelle Devereaux
Business Efficacy
(503) 581-4100
rochelle@businessmasters.com

If you have a problem with listening in your organization, send your question or concern to: Rochelle Devereaux, Business Efficacy, PO Box 4081, Salem, OR 97302-1081; email: rochelle@businessmasters.com.

A. ______________________

B. ______________________

C. ______________________

D. ______________________

E. ______________________

II. You have come close on several occasions to actually reaching the next growth level for the company, only to have disaster strike and things go back to where they were before.

When owners identify and correct the “why” of stagnation, they grow and succeed. Otherwise they may simply stay where they are until they grow so tired the business is lost or they give up and quit.

Are you at that decision point? I believe that most owners can succeed in growing their company to its next sales and profitability step. But, it may take some serious rethinking on their part to make it happen. Here’s what I mean:

III. Picture a business’ progress as a series of stairs. Each riser represents a growth phase, each tread represents a plateau or leveling off area.

IV. The first set of treads are wide and the risers are shallow. The wider the tread, the longer that business phase lasts. The shallower the riser, the shorter the growth phase.

V. As the owner progresses up the stairs, there are periods where the treads are very narrow and the risers are steep. This represents rapid growth.

Now, if the owner is comfortable with growth, they continue to climb the stairs using ladders or other aids to pull themselves up the steep risers to the next tread and lead all their employees, customers and others up with them. Where the owner is uncomfortable with growth, they get part way up the ladder and falter, causing the ladder, themselves and their employees to fall down to the last tread. At that point, the people who are very comfortable sitting on that tread do everything they can to stay right there. The ones who wanted to reach up to that next level get frustrated and leave.

The longer the owner sits on a tread, the harder it gets to pick up the ladder, get people who will support the ladder while the owner climbs it, and reach and stay on the next tread. One reason is that the fall from the ladder becomes the focus, instead of the reasons the owner and employees were trying to climb it in the first place.

How long have you have been on the tread leading to major expansion and growth? Maybe you have the products, the sales reps, the outlets. But, do you have the internal support people who will hold the ladder for you as you go up? No? Perhaps the reason you don’t is fear.

Fear comes from a variety of sources. Each individual is unique. My personal experience with others in similar circumstances shows some of the reasons.

VI. Fear of greater knowledge: Many people are afraid of what they don’t know. This is primeval. Since recorded time, people have shunned others who appear to have greater knowledge than they think they have themselves.

A. Symptom: employees who have limited skills in the very areas the owner needs the most. Necessary information for growth and stability is unavailable because no one in the company has the knowledge and skill to prepare them properly.

B. Symptom: blurred carbon copies of the owner. This means they have knowledge in the same areas that the owner does, but are not as good as the owner in these areas. So, instead of complementing the owner, the employee duplicates, but less effectively, the owner.

VII. Fear of success:  For a variety of reasons some people are afraid to succeed because they feel they don’t deserve it.

A. Symptom: reaching the point where the business will take off and everyone rises to that next level or goal, and sabotaging those efforts by losing a key account or key personnel needed to sustain the effort.

VIII.Fear of failure: How well do we cope with setbacks. If we are confident in our abilities, we can shrug off bad experiences. If not, we try very hard not to put ourselves in positions where we could make a mistake.

A.Symptom: reaching the bottom of the next high riser and finding reasons why you can’t climb the ladder;

B.Symptom: looking backward to past failures rather than looking for ways to use the knowledge gained by the setback to achieve success.

Sometimes fear manifests itself physically. Sometimes it shows in an unwillingness to hear advice and suggestions that can make a difference. Sometimes it’s a combination of the two. There are other ways, but these are the two major ones.

If you are creating obstacles to your company’s success, one of the first things you need to do is figure out why. Until you do, they will continue to rob you of the goals you outlined above.

If you sincerely want your company to succeed, I believe that you and your company can be as successful as you want and will allow. Once you’ve made that decision, if you need help getting up the next riser, contact Rochelle Devereaux at Business Efficacy.

The Listening Corner

Over the past months I have made several Power Listening presentations to executive groups. A number of the issues raised during those sessions are pretty universal. So, I thought I’d share some with you, along with possible solutions, in the next several issues. Keep in mind that each individual is different. So you need to modify any solution to your personality and that of anyone with which you are dealing. If you have a situation you don’t see here, or have a management question, please feel free to contact me at the address and phone on the masthead, or send an e-mail to rochelle@businessmasters.com.

An individual feels he is not listened to because his idea is not implemented. It’s just a bad idea.

Sometimes it is difficult to tell an employee that their ideas are not usable. However, not telling them and also not implementing the idea definitely sends the message that they are not heard. Later on, when they do have a “good” idea, they won’t come forward and everyone loses. 

There are a number of ways the scenario can play. One is that the person hearing the idea is busy judging the concept as it is presented. It is either “good” or “bad”. That judgement creates a barrier between the speaker and the listener. If the decision is that the idea is “bad”, no further action is taken and the employee feels slighted. Another is that, having carefully listened to the employee, the manager recognizes specific flaws in the idea, but isn’t sure how to relate that and so says nothing. 

While it may take a little more time, engage the employee is a short dialogue. You may know that the idea won’t work and why. Obviously, the employee does not, or hasn’t taken the time to work through the details. Depending on the situation, there are a couple of possible alternatives to silence. 

Start by rephrasing the idea and thank them for raising the issue. That alone will let them know that you heard them. It also allows for any clarification of misunderstandings either in your interpretation or their delivery. Now the possible alternatives: 

1.   Ask how they believe it could be implemented, the costs and time frame. Point out your reservations. See if they have considered them. If so, how would the employee overcome them. If they have no workable solution, tell them that until there is one, the idea cannot be used. Get their agreement that there are problems associated with the idea. 

2.   Ask the employee how they arrived at the idea. It may be that the thought process started at a logical point, but got sidetracked. Simply understanding how they came to their conclusion will indicate if there are any points which can be used. It may also point up a problem area of which you were unaware. 

Using either approach not only lets the employee know they have been heard, it also teaches them the concerns and considerations that you have to evaluate before changes can be made. Over time, they may learn how to assess their ideas before they approach you. It also encourages a more open relationship with employees which may present potential problems to you before they become major crises.

Clarity is the key to making things clear; removing confusion. It is also subject to interpretation.

Business and personal communications require precision. That is easier said than done. Each person brings their own set of expectations, experiences and personal agendas to every conversation. If they don’t match those of the other participants, miscommunication occurs. How then, do you overcome the obstacles to clarity?

• Identify your biases: “know thyself” is still the best tool. If you know the things that interfere with your ability to hear and understand others, you can offset them.
• Listen to others: really hear speakers, concentrate on what they are saying to you before you start thinking about what you think they mean.
• Just ask: if something doesn’t make sense, or you have any doubts about a point, ask the speaker to rephrase the statement. If you don’t, they probably think you understand.
• Restate what you heard: give the speaker the opportunity to explain any discrepancies in what you think you heard and what they meant to say.

One of the strongest myths today is that listening is a natural activity. Effective listening is a learned skill. Our listening style becomes a habit, which like all habits, can be either productive or ineffective. We start developing our listening habits as children. We watch the people around us, and mimic their behavior. Some examples are better than others. Certain techniques work well at one point of our lives, but become dangerous to use later on.

Effective listeners constantly seek out new tools and practice with them. Using the clarity techniques listed here will give you the edge you need to be an effective and successful communicator.

© 1998 Rochelle Devereaux
Business Efficacy

• Everyone participates in developing the company’s mission and plans to implement it.
• Employees are encouraged to make suggestions for better service, improved products, etc. to management/leadership.
• Supervisors/managers/leaders show respect for all employees by explaining any changes and getting their ideas on implementing them.
• Morale and enthusiasm are high in the company.

If you strongly agree, you have a communicating company. If you strongly disagree, you have a managing company. If you somewhat agree or disagree, you have a combination of communication and management. You need to identify where and why information restrictions occur.

Over management can lead to communications blockages. Information is meted out sparingly. Employees may not know if their efforts are important, or how they fit into the company’s plans. Productivity and morale often suffer.

Strong, innovative company leaders communicate effectively with their employees. They listen and create dialogues with everyone in the organization. Through these efforts, everyone shares in the company’s vision and purpose. Productivity and morale are enhanced and encouraged.

Not all information can be shared. But, if everyone contributes or is included in the company’s overall planning, they understand why and it may have little impact on productivity and morale.

Check your company’s internal systems. Look for ways to increase information flow. Communicate, don’t manage.

Rochelle Devereaux
Business Efficacy
© 1998